A child is one of life’s most precious gifts. As a mother of two, I simply can not understand or accept how a mother could possibly decide to live the “anorexic lifestyle” or be “pro ana.”
Does it get anymore vain and selfish than this?
Live Journal has quite a growing bunch of mothers who share their pro anorexic lifestyle stories, right out there for the world to see, as if this is something to be proud of.
They carry on as if this is a game, all the while their children suffering in the background, as seen in this lovely post;
WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH ME
I CANT HOLD FOOD IN MY STOMACH ANYMORE EVEN THE KIDS R ASKING QUESTION
MOM U R ALWAYS BARFING
WHAT DO YOU SAY TO YOUR KIDS IN A SITUATION LIKE MINE
I HATE MYSELF
I THOUGH I WAS FOOLING EVERYONE I GUESS NOT
Kids are keen. They are intuitive. They do not miss a beat, even at just a few years of age they sense what is going on in the household.
When you are able to give birth to a child, and that child is happy and healthy, I don’t think there is much more one can ask for in life. From that day forward, our job as mothers is to protect that child. Provide them with a secure, balanced, positive enviroment to grow and to thrive, and to become the person they desire to be.
There is no way in hell a mother can be pro ana, and be a healthy positive influence on her child. It’s impossible. These women who are are CHOOSING this selfish, dangerous, vain lifestyle shouldn’t be parents. I believe if a social worker were to see their online behavior, their parental ability would be in jeopardy.
For the past year, I have read countless stories from courageous young women who post here with their horror stories about their own mothers. They tell how their mothers influenced their own beauty and body image, they express details on their recollection of a childhood filled with negativity towards food, and their mothers constantly warning them not to eat for they too would fall victim to the dreaded fat. They reveal hurt feelings about their mother’s who were more concerned about themselves, than for them or their other siblings.
If your mother is one of these individuals, you need to know this, and believe this. Make it your mantra.
It is not your fault. It is not about you. Your mother was a selfish person before you were born, and she will continue to be this selfish person as you grow and recover from your eating disorder.
Let her be your great bad example. Let her be the person you think of when you think of what you never want to be.
And when the glorious, life changing day comes, when you are given the gift of a child you will understand the depth of love a real mother should have and want nothing more then for your child to live a happy, healthy life providing them with nothing but unconditional love.
Please feel free to share your personal story of your mother. Was she a positive influence on your beauty and body image? Or did she contribute to you low self esteem and/or eating disorder?
Let these pro ana Mom’s know what they are doing to their kids, maybe a few of them will head our advice and get their head screwed on straight.
Mother daughter image credit: Julie Harris