Eating Disorder ProAna Blogger Focused on Body Image and Self Esteem

Andre’a sent me this video and asked me to post it. After watching it, it is my pleasure to post it. I post this with a message of hope and prayer to all of you reading my blog.

I wish for you happiness, self confidence, and freedom from self hatred.

I wish for you glimpses of hope in your daily life that give you the energy to believe a better life awaits you.

I wish for you adults that have their heads screwed on straight, capable of guiding you down a path of self confidence and respect for your body.

I wish for you friends that surround you, encourage you, and never judge you.

Even if my wishes do not come true, you will make it. You are going to make it. This ED hell is going to pass, and you are going to live the life you were meant to. As horrific as all of this is, I truly believe it is happening for a reason. That reason alludes you now, but someday it will be clear.

As clear as it became to me when I started writing this blog 20 years after my struggles had past. The day I wrote my first post was the day I understood why I suffered so much to get to this place.

Love,

mamaV

XOXO

I caught this video on whim, and loved it! Katy Perry has been iffy to me in terms of appropriateness (cupcakes as boobs…..really?)

But the theme for Firework is so inspiring;

4 young adults with different issues/insecurities that are holding them back from being themselves;

An girl who feels overweight not swimming at a party.

A child with cancer, bald from chemo stuck in the hospital.

Kids in a household with fighting parents.

Gay young male wanting to come out.

Check it out and tell me what you think. Love, mv

Here is a lovely video showing a dance troupe of 7 YEAR OLD GIRLS strutting around on stage to Beyonce’s “Single Lady’s” tune.  They not only imitate Beyonce’s hip thrusts and humping actions, they’ve got the full on lip pout come and get me look.

A) Who picked the song “Single Lady’s” for these children?

B) The outfits. Someone had to MAKE those outfits since to my knowledge Victoria Secret is not (yet) selling size 8 for girls.

C) The dance. These kids are great, you can see it when they actually twirl and jump, so why the need to turn what should have been a once in a lifetime opportunity into a fiasco should haunt them their whole lives.

D) Will the parents of these darlings please step forward and tell us what in gods name do you think you are teaching your daughter besides 1) I am a sex object 2) I am a sex object 3) I am a sex object.

(more…)

I’ve been reading REAL magazine since they started publishing, and I’ve got to say these girls have something totally unique (and there artwork rules!)

The About Us Page describes REAL as;

REAL is a heart beat, a love letter, a wink, a kiss, a smile, a tear, a hug. REAL is two hands holding, a single idea, a dream, a fire, a sea, a crazy pirate, a colour, a song, a season. Being real can’t be written in words, there’s no manual on how to be real, because we are all real, if we exist we are real.

REAL is written by young women from across the world. It was created to inspire you to do amazing and outrageous things. We aim to challenge you to think outside the box and consider want being real is to you.

Join them! I promise you will start to think a bit differently about yourself, and the world around you.

Love,

mV

A beaten, bruised image of 19 year old
pop star Rihanna is everywhere; magazine covers, tabloids, and even
on Oprah.

Police reports state: Rihanna questioned her boyfriend, Chris Brown, about text messages (from a woman). He proceeded to punch her bloody, put her in a headlock, and now….they are writing a book and will sing a duo together.

How romantic.

Oprah is focused on the Rihanna abuse situation today, as am I, because this presents the opportunity to speak about this topic…one that is all too common in the history of those with eating disorders.

As it turns out, both Rihanna and Brown come from abusive homes. They are both still just kids themselves.

"When you grew up in an environment where there is abuse, it's more
acceptable to you," Winfrey said. "If you go back with a man who hits
you it's because you don't think you're worthy of being with a man who
won't."

Unworthiness. How often have I heard that word from the eating disordered, when the direct opposite is
true?

The abuser is the one who is unworthily.
The abuser is unworthy of your love and affection.
The abuser is the one with the problem.
The abuser is the one that needs to punished.

At the core of it all; lack of self esteem. No one deserves this. I state this because several teens on Oprah were expressing this point of view stating "Rihanna started it."

Let's get this perfectly straight;

1. No level of physical abuse is ok.
   None. Not a slap, a push or being held against your will.

2. No level of verbal abuse is
   acceptable. If you have some one telling you that you are not good

   enough by shouting obscenities in your face….step back and look at
   them. Look at what a pathetic person they are for needing to degrade
   and control another person. Especially a person they "love."

3. No woman, or man, deserves this treatment.
   Period. There is no action that causes another person to be violent,
   its a con game.

4. If it happens once, it will
   happen again. This is a fact and you are kidding yourself if you
   believe in the abuser for one more moment.

From the world I come from, the image of Rihanna is shocking, and I mean totally, and completely shocking. I have never, ever even had a man, or woman for that matter, even try to lay a hand on me. Ever. Not my parents, a boyfriend, my husband, or any friend or family member. Nor have I ever witnessed such violence.This type of violent treatment is so totally out of my
realm of reality it just stuns me.

I want it to start stunning YOU.

You need to be stunned by any and all verbal and/or physical abuse in your life.

And you need to turn away from it to get your life back.

Either that, or you stay in this cycle of abuse and watch a small part of you fade away with each and every punch, slap, and cuss word.

You are not alone- reach out for help.

-mV
XOXOXO

————————————————–

RESOURCES:

If you need help or know someone who does, call the National Teen
Dating Abuse Helpline at 866-331-9474 or the National Domestic Violence
Hotline at 800-799-SAFE

Love is not abuse

Love is respect

Teen Dating Bill Of Rights

7 Warning Signs of Teen Abuse

Call for help: 1-866-331-9474 or 1-866-331-8453 TTY.

I'm sorry but any woman who lines up for a cattle call for a chance to marry "some dude" is nuts. I mean really girls, where has our self esteem gone?

Yahoo's Top Entertainment Story Today, why would you want to subject yourself to this?

This latest fiasco on The Bachelor is the kicker - the guy proposes to one, then changes his mind and asks the other – and she accepts? The 50's are over man, and why are we headed back?

I truly think this is pathetic. If one of my friends, or god forbid my daughter someday, wanted to go on this program I would be seriously worried about their mental health.

A. You don't line up for a husband under any circumstances.

B. You don't beg a guy to choose you. 

C. You sure as hell don't go on national TV, stand in a room of other contenders, and start balling if you don't get "a rose."

This all goes back to one simple thing – self esteem.

If these girls had any respect for themselves, they would not even dream of getting married this way (and none of you better either!)

I blame the rest on their parents, yes they are grown women, but for cripes sake can't we even raise a child with the confidence to stand on their own, know what they are worth, and not settle for less? The parents of these fine, smart women even participate in the selection process for goodness sake!

NOT normal. Rant over.

Am I off my rocker?

mV

What do you see when you look in the mirror?

About Face, by Burt and Kline, is a book I stumbled upon a few weeks ago. The forward is written by Bobbi Brown, I woman I never thought much of – until now. I'll admit; I judged Brown. I assumed she was fake, being a makeup artist and all, but her story floored me.

"When I was eighteen, my mother offered to buy me a nose job. I still remember the moment she sat on my bed and told me that she loved me and wanted the best for me. She said a nose job would make me more beautiful," Brown states.

She point blank turned down her mothers offer because she liked what she saw when she looked in the mirror, and this moment laid the foundation for her life work.

My husband is familiar with the book, he has seen me reading it over the past few weeks, so we started discussing it.

"So, what do you see when you look in the mirror?" I asked him.

"Ummm….I usually think I look tired. Black circles…you know" he revealed.

"What else?" I prodded.

"What do you mean what else?" he asked sincerely (he really didn't understand what I meant).

"Do you like what you see?" I said.

Pause.

"Yeah. Usually." he said.

"That's it?" I asked.

"Pretty much," he said "I guess a book like that written by men would be really boring."

Now understand, my husband is a thinker. I call him the girl in our relationship sometimes because he loves discussing things, issues, thoughts, ideas (he's as writer, didn't I get lucky?). The fact that he didn't really have much to say on this topic really made me think.

Guys generally don't have issues with their looks. They don't obsess. They don't crisis in front of the mirror every morning. They don't spend a fortune on makeup. And they don't change their outfit 10 times before going out. They accept the hand they are dealt and they live their lives.

So we carried on talking about this subject for a minute or two, and then he said-

"Babe, not to change the subject, but can you shave my back?"

Shave his back. I was dieing laughing.

Damn, life is easier as a guy,

- mamaV

P.S. The next post will be my thoughts on what I see when I look in the mirror and I'll be looking forward to hearing your personal story. This is a way harder exercise then I thought it would be….so start pondering how you feel and how you can put it into words.

——-

So here is what I see when I look in the mirror.

Many of you state that you do not have support, you don’t relate, your family does not understand. So I pose a challenge back to you.

Find a role model.

There is one out there for each and every one of you, but you may have to keep searching until you find that individual that gets you. The person who doesn’t judge, always listens, and gently guides you to the help you need.

Let the hunt begin!

Step #1: Your Parents
First and foremost, approach your parents. You can let your guard down, and tell them- tell them what you are going through. Although you don’t believe they will understand, the vast majority of parents will understand and they want nothing more than to help their children.

I remember when I told my mom about my ED, I was so scared, but I was so sick of it all too. It was so weird to me that she didn’t notice on her own, wasn’t it obvious I was suffering? It wasn’t. My mom is the most intuitive, loving, giving person, and even she did not see all the signs I thought I was shoving in her face.  So, you need to get over the fact that no one is paying attention to your issues, and understand they may not even be aware.

Step #2: Siblings & Relatives
If the parent route doesn’t fly, or they are simply not good role models, you need to look beyond them.

Many of you have expressed that your mother has pushed her body hate on to you. Or you have an insensitive father who calls you fat or is just plain abusive. Their issues are not your issues. Just get it out of your head that you were meant to be in this position and you will never get out of it. There is a way out — you just need to open your eyes, and trust you will be guided.

You need to look to siblings and other family members. Most of us have
someone in our lives we kind of trust, someone that has the potential to be real, so you need to reach out to them.

Step #3: Friends
No,no no – you are not stopping here. If you’ve gotten this far and everyone has disappointed you, take a few deep breaths and regroup.

You have likely been squashed to the mat. It sucks, big time. But you have got to get up again. When you get knocked down in life, do your crying, and then get up. Get up and keep moving.

Ok, so what friends to you have? Don’t say “none. Chances are you have pushed everyone away so you can immerse yourself in your ED. Call a few of those people back into your life. Take the chance that they will listen and that they will help.

Step #4: Teachers & Colleagues
If the family has failed you, your friends are not there, you then move on to search for people that it will likely be harder to approach. I am talking about teachers, colleagues, hell – try the gym instructor.

Guys, life is really rough sometimes. You may very well fall down several times before you find the right person, but you will if you persevere. No one said it was going to be easy.

So that’s the plan. Let’s do it and see where we end up.

What I see is young women stuck. Stuck in a pattern of self hate that has become the norm, it is expected, it is all in compassing.

But it doesn’t need to be- you just have to step outside your boundaries. Take chances. Make mistakes. This is all part of growing up and living life. And living life hating yourself not a life at all. You know this.

If you are ready, I challenge you to find that role model this week.

Figure out who that person is, muster up the courage to tell them who you really are, and let it all fly.

I am expecting we will have some good stories, some not so good stories. But such is life. The only way out of this big black hole is to crawl out. At least you’ll do the crawling with others who understand.

You are not alone,

mamaV

xoxo

——————————————

Post inspired by The National Report on the State of Self Esteem, Real Girls, Real Pressure, commissioned by Dove. Read it, absorb it, and tell yourself you will not be a statistic.

Just got back from Madtown, our capital city, a college town that had me absorbed in its free spirit and sense of identity. I came back with a bag full of clothes from Goodwill, a budda necklace, and tons of cool stickers and buttons.

Time to share;

Think big girls.

Kind of over the top, but got to love ‘em! More here from Ann Taintor, and OliveSandwiches

That’s US!

Be you.

Hope one of these brought a smile to your face! 

Love,

mamaV

enjoy your weekend,

Love,

mamaV

XOXO

—–

Shelly from the HBO Documentary THIN has something to say today.

I wake up every morning and ask myself….

Is it worth it? 

Is it worth fighting all the negativity in my mind today?  Is it worth having put trust my in others so often because I cannot trust myself at times?  Is it worth eating and gaining weight?  Is it worth feeling feelings I haven’t allowed myself to feel in so long?  Is worth taking on responsibility when I have run from it in the past?  Is it worth having to talk about things that bother me instead of internalizing them and having them subconsciously wreck my mind?  Is it worth being accountable to myself and others in my life?  Is it worth growing up?  Is it worth taking a risk getting hurt again?  Is it worth getting close to others and letting others in? Is it worth taking risks and possibly failing?  Is it worth taking care of myself…showering, brushing my teeth, my hair?  Is it worth getting dressed? Is it worth finding out who I am and doing what life wants me to do?  Is it worth surrendering to everything I thought was right?  Is it worth learning new ways to cope?  Is it worth setbacks?  Is it worth not knowing what the future holds?  Is it worth giving up the control I thought I had? IS it worth finding out things that could hurt and overwhelm me? Is it worth being so anxious that I can’t even sit still? IS it worth giving up my identity that I have held on to for so long?  Is it worth challenging TV, internet, and radio who say I have to fit some ideal? 

Is it worth it to keep going down the road of recovery?

Do I want to lose my family, friends, and most importantly MYSELF?  Do I want a life of pain and hurt and suffering?  Do I want to die?

NO

So I guess it is worth it to keep fighting no matter how scary and hard it gets.

-Shelly

I love Hannah Montana. Not afraid to admit it.

My daugther and I saw the Hannah Montana Concert Movie in 3D  on Thursday (with the funky glasses and all), and it was a blast. Not only is this girl a great performer, her message is clear – believe in yourself.

[youtube=http://youtube.com/watch?v=XJk5hxVb8ks]

 ”Who Said” is my favorite, and even as a 38 year old career woman I listen to it after I’ve had a bad day in the shark invested business world, to remind me who I am and why I am here.

If you are not using music as therapy, I highly recommend you try it. The right lyrics and melodies can transcent you from your low down funk to a place high above the static and help you refocus on your goals.

Best place to start? The library, gather up a bunch of artists to try, for free, load them on your ipod and drift away.

MamaV’s Greatest Hits

American Idiot, Green Day

Be Here Now, Mason Jennings

Idiot Wind, Dylan

One, Mary J. Blige & U2

Sari, Nellie McKay

Whatever People Say I Am That’s What I Am Not, Arctic Monkeys (for you Vanessa)

Suddenly I see, KD Tunstall

Walking Contradiction, Green Day

First Day Of My Life, Bright Eyes

I Had Lost My Mind, Daniel Johnston

What songs motivate you to be the best you can be?

Your life is now. Don’t miss a moment.

-mamaV

2008 is starting out with a bang. Here’s a highlight of some leaders in the effort to bring some real, healthy, interesting perspective on beauty:

Real Magazine

Fed up with “Impossible Princesses,” Erin Young, 20 set out to create Real Magazine debuting this month in Australia. Her 18 year old sister Jean, joined in the effort, and together  they set up the magazine with funds from the State Government and distributed more than 5000 copies. The girls, from Stanhope, in north-central Victoria, are seeking sponsors for the second issue.

“I just wanted to be thinner. Even though I was so skinny I still thought I was fat. Every one of my friends in high school had some level of eating disorder and was worried about the way they looked,” Ms Young said as she explained her motivation behind her magazine.

Indigo

Indigo founder Leanne Koster with cover girl Gemma Patista, 14, at home in Barwon Heads.
Photo: Drew Ryan

Mother of two Leanne Koster founded Indigo, a glossy magazine for girls aged 10 to 14, with the catchline “Giving Girls a Voice”.  More than 250 schools have taken out subscriptions, and many of the stories — tackling topics such as cyber-bullying, self-esteem and fashion — are written by girls whose mothers are thrilled with a positive media role model.

Reality Diaries

It appears Dove is in it for the long haul, defining real beauty, creating the term “pro-age”, and now Reality Diaries. Their goal is to reach 5 million women by 2010.

The diaries follow the lives of several young women and highlight their struggles with self esteem, body image, and beauty. I’d like to see the production of this a bit less polished, but overall I think the message is great.

Are you media smart? Do the quiz, it’s kind of interesting (you should know that Dove is owned by Unilever, a company that owns several other beauty brands for both men and women. Some have issues with this, I do not, but I like to point it out since this topic tends to come up with I post about Dove).

Girl Scouts

The good ole’ Girl Scouts are still plugging along, strong as ever after 95 years. That’s really incredible if you think about it.

If you are not a Scout, join.

If you are, get more involved.

If you are a mom, be a leader.

The highlight of my year is when I lead my daughters troop for a week at camp. The sharing and experiences that happen out in the wilderness are something to be experienced. There still is something about getting away from it all that puts things in perspective.

So who do you think is doing a good job fighting for the “real beauty” cause?

-mamaV

Who ventures out without makeup? If not, why not?

[youtube=http://youtube.com/watch?v=2qmi_jdb4qc]

One of my friends recently told me her mothers perspective of makeup was that it only covers up your natural beauty,  that is why you look so “weird” to yourself without it. This was kind of a religious perspective against makeup, which I don’t buy, but I thought it was interesting none the less.

When I head out of the house, I generally don’t think all that much about what my face looks like, especially if I am going to the grocery store, Target, who cares really?  What have I got to hide?

When I do wear it, I generally find myself digging through my purse at stoplights. It’s just kind of a hassle, and I hate taking time to put it on. Sure, I like how I look with some makeup on, I just need it to be quick and easy.

In modeling, we weren’t allowed to wear makeup. This is why I crack up at ANTM, the girls are all jazzed up and made to believe they will need this skill in the modeling world. Magazines and photographers want to see you “clean faced,” nothing to hide behind, so the whole facade Tyra creates is bogus.

I always find it sad when I hear of a woman that won’t leave the house without makeup, or someone is so totally overdone while out shopping, that I wonder how long they spent in front of the mirror analyzing their imaginary imperfections. We put alot of pressure on ourselves don’t we?

Where do you  fit into this picture?

mamaV

Vanity. No limit to the insanity.

I have been pondering this topic for quite a while, so when I read about a pair of $18,000 blue jeans in 944 Magazine, I blew a gasket.

“The diamonds set in white 14K gold on the back pockets depict snow on 7th Avenue, as it would be during the holidays,” according to Chasi Prasad, Wynn’s Bishop of Seventh co-founder. (What is ole’ Chasi smokin? And can I have some? I wanna see the winter wonderland.)

Bottomline: We just have too damn much money on our hands.

I am in Sin City, Las Vegas, at the Hard Rock of all places. Sex, beauty, money, and glamour rules here. Yeah, it’s fun to watch, but at the end of the day, it makes me very sad because I don’t get it.

Ladies, do we really need a $20, 000  designer handbag?

Martha strutting into court with her now famous Hermes bag. (Rent here)

Is it crucial to have a diamond encrusted ass?

Do we need to have liposuction on our feet to fit into Jimmy Choos? 

Jimmy Choo addicts can’t live without several pairs of these babies.

Are we really this pathetic? I use the word pathetic, in a nice way, if that’s possible. Pathetic because this screams “I HAVE NO SELF ESTEEM.”

Why? Because its just so totally over the top, and selfish, I can’t take it.

How in the hell do you march up and down the street in such silly clothing and accessories without noticing the homeless guy sleeping against his shopping cart?

Sure, we all deserve nice things. We work hard for our money, it’s ok to spend it, but what happened to spending wisely?

This is way the hell out of hand.

-mamaV

Misery. We wallow in it, we promote it, we continue behaviors to fuel it, all while telling others we are trying. Are we trying? Or have you given up at the moment?

If you are at the depths of your ED, you are probably ready to smack me right now, but that’s good. At least you are alive and thinking. The hard thing about eating disorders is they are all encompassing. You are either in, or out, there’s is not a lot of in between.

Plus nothing phases you when you are in deep. The mind reels incessantly, like a hamster on a wheel, squeaking as it spins, day in and day out, until you don’t know what normal is anymore. Can you imagine if someone was tape recording your daily thoughts? Nuts. Absolutely insane.

How many times would you say negative feelings about yourself?

How much would you be questioning your actions? What you said? How you said it? What ‘they’ think of you?

It’s a damn living nightmare, but I am here to say you can come back. Come back stronger, and harder, and more confident. You can beat this devil of a disease, but it takes persistence, resilience, and one hell of a lot of energy.

Let me tell you what’s waiting for you on the other side. Visualize being capable of;

Reading a book and not losing your place because you can’t concentrate on anything but hunger pains.

Sitting at the dinner table with friends, focused on their faces, expressions, and their words, rather than the food that will not stop calling your name.

The mirror becomes just a mirror, not the arch enemy, judge and jury.

Forgetting, honestly, forgetting to eat because you were so engaged in an activity.

Tell me the last thing you did where you felt like you were in the moment?

Just living life for life’s sake.

Let’s talk new year.  Fresh start. Breaking old habits. Building upon healthy ones.

I want you to: Believe, conceive, achieve.

-mamaV

PS my new year’s resolution is to stop underestimating. When it comes to time, energy, effort, you name it- I will underestimate what it will take to accomplish it. I like to call it “optimism….to a fault.”

I am a bit behind the news these days due to job constraints, but I figured you would all like a chance to comment on the latest celebrity reaction to the dreaded, EVIL CELLULITE SAGA.

Former beauty, turned lard ass Jennifer Love Hewitt defends herself against the legal stalkers who snapped her images during a vacation to Hawaii, stating for the record her ”size 2 is not fat!”

Not sure what her size has to do with the argument, by hey, she tried. She also posted a nice message on her blog to all of us fellow porkers to “stay strong.”

My bet is Jennifer Love turns up about 30 pounds lighter a few months from now. Would you blame her? Who the hell could take this kind of heat? Not I.

Let’s discuss cellulite for a moment. Why do we fight it? Why is it deemed so bad, ugly and horrid? Who decided this? There is no cream, lipo, or other bullshit treatment that is going to get rid of it – so let it go and live your damn life already ladies.

Just $30 of your hard earned money will get you this con job in a jar by Sephora, the beauty marketing geniuses dedicated to stealing you blind.

Even when I was a bone, I still had it. Trust me, it was there. Now that I am a normal weight, still there, don’t care.

Be friend your damn cellulite already and move on for gods sake. I have spent the last two summers at Girl Scout Camp, pleading with the other mom’s to hop in the pond with me and the troop. They always claim one excuse or another, as they sweat to death in the sun, all while their eyes tell me their real story.

They are scared. Scared of their cellulite. Scared of what others will think. Scared to be called the F-word.

This saddens me deeply, because I know all they are missing. Worse yet, I know the message being sent to the girls – hide your body, its ugly and fat.

I hope for you, your day of freedom comes soon. The day that you catch a glimpse of your rear in the mirror, and smile, is a glorious awakening.

It’s all for naught,

mamaV

I looked forward to posting about the 1 Year Anniversary of the mamaVISION blog. I recorded a warm hearted video, expressed my genuine thanks, only to be whacked upside the head by the the first two individuals who posted. Not exactly the love-fest I envisioned.

Does this bother me? Yes.

Does this hurt my feelings? At times.

You’ve got to be thick skinned to run a blog such as this, wimp out and you’ll be dead in the water. I think we can all learn from this (lord knows I have learned about myself throughout the months of writing here). At moments of frustration, I surely think ‘why the hell do I add this frustration to my life!’

From observing this, I want you girls to evaluate yourself. Could you handle this constant barrage of your opinions, and personality? If the answer is no, let’s start toughening up. This quality will take you far in life, in business, in relationships. Without a core belief in who you are and what you stand for, the world will flatten you- daily.

One can really learn from putting your voice out there for all to comment, criticize (whether constructively or not). I love the Vanessa’s and Josie’s of the world, they are necessary, and they add an element to our debates that would not be thought about if it was not for them taking the time to express themselves. At times, posts say more about the posters rather than me, don’t they?

Free speech- all for it.

Deliberate, random slamming of the blog host – not too keen on this. Why? Because its distracting from the topic.

Point being, let’s try to set a few ground rules:

1) When posting, let’s stick to the topic at hand. Off topic posts distract us all, and I would appreciate this focus.

2) Random rants on me and what a jerk I am should be posted in the aboutMAMA section.

3) Express yourself without this inappropriate language which only serves to distract from the point your are attempting to make.

4) Correcting another person’s grammar is arrogant, and does nothing more than make you look like a snob.

Feel free to suggest other ’loose’ rules we should put in place.  

Final thought to ponder…the next time you are criticized or you are shy about presenting your feelings for fear you will be unpopular, step back. Think about what it means to speak your mind, remember you are developing your character, and you will be better for it.

The time you spend worrying about what others think about you is time being untrue to yourself.

-mamaV

 KT Tunstall.

Adopted. Outsider. Half chinese, half Irish.

Told at 27 she was “too old” to be a rock star. 

10 years of singing in coffee shops, lovingly told to “get a real job” by her father.

Yet she persisted.

 [youtube=http://youtube.com/watch?v=0tlU-1u1JC8]

What do the words to this song mean to you?

“Suddenly I See”

Suddenly I see (Suddenly I see)
This is what I wanna be
Suddenly I see (Suddenly I see)
Why the hell it means so much to me-mamaV