Eating Disorder ProAna Blogger Focused on Body Image and Self Esteem

I am sure you have been following the latest "your fat, no I'm not saga" involving Megan McCain and Laura Ingraham…but if not here's the gist;

In a purely political discussion, of which both women are respected thought leaders, Ingraham chose to make a wise crack about McCain being "plus sized."

WTF big time.

McCain shot back with intelligent, well thought out remarks on the View yesterday;

"What do young women think when I speak my mind about politics and I
want to have a political discussion about the ideological future of the
Republican Party and the answer is, 'She's fat, she shouldn't have an
opinion'?"

Discussion continued on her blog today;

All I can do is try to be a positive role model for women of my
generation and, I hope, help show that no matter what industry you are
in, what size you are has nothing to do with your worth.

Ok, good, good. McCain had me going until this excuse for herself sputtered out of her mouth;

"I have been teased about my weight and body figure since I was in
middle school, and I decided a very long time ago to embrace what God
gave me and live my life positively, attempting to set an example for
other girls who may suffer from body image issues. I have nothing to
hide: I am a size 8 and fluctuated up to a size 10 during the campaign.
It’s ridiculous even to have this conversation because I am not
overweight in the least and have a natural body weight."

Sorry babe, but you are talking out of both sides of your mouth. Are you embracing what God gave you or trying to convince the world that you are comfortable with it?

Why did she feel the need to reveal her actual dress size for cripes sake? Doesn't this in itself show her insecurity and her need to prove she is good enough?

I'm not trying to hammer McCain too much, she's under one hell of a lot of pressure here and I am not sure I would articulate my points any better, but the whole thing is just totally and completely infuriating.

So here we sit.

Women sparring women.

I've always said it, we are our worst enemy girls.

Until we find peace within ourselves,

we are basically screwed.

-mV

These two executive FREAKS from the Bank of England held a "Dress for Success" day in order issue the following memo to their female employees;

“Look professional, not fashionable; be careful with perfume; always
wear a heel of some sort — maximum 2 inches; always wear some sort of
makeup — even if it’s just lipstick.” Shoes and skirt must be the same
color. No-no’s include ankle chains — “professional, but not the one
you want to be associated with;” white high heels; overstuffed
handbags; an overload of rings, and double-pierced ears.

In the midst of the largest financial crisis since the Depression, you're telling me THIS is what these dudes are spending their time on? When questioned by WWD, they stuttered around with weak excuses blaming the messaging on some consultants.

We have officially entered The Twilight Zone.
mV

A beaten, bruised image of 19 year old
pop star Rihanna is everywhere; magazine covers, tabloids, and even
on Oprah.

Police reports state: Rihanna questioned her boyfriend, Chris Brown, about text messages (from a woman). He proceeded to punch her bloody, put her in a headlock, and now….they are writing a book and will sing a duo together.

How romantic.

Oprah is focused on the Rihanna abuse situation today, as am I, because this presents the opportunity to speak about this topic…one that is all too common in the history of those with eating disorders.

As it turns out, both Rihanna and Brown come from abusive homes. They are both still just kids themselves.

"When you grew up in an environment where there is abuse, it's more
acceptable to you," Winfrey said. "If you go back with a man who hits
you it's because you don't think you're worthy of being with a man who
won't."

Unworthiness. How often have I heard that word from the eating disordered, when the direct opposite is
true?

The abuser is the one who is unworthily.
The abuser is unworthy of your love and affection.
The abuser is the one with the problem.
The abuser is the one that needs to punished.

At the core of it all; lack of self esteem. No one deserves this. I state this because several teens on Oprah were expressing this point of view stating "Rihanna started it."

Let's get this perfectly straight;

1. No level of physical abuse is ok.
   None. Not a slap, a push or being held against your will.

2. No level of verbal abuse is
   acceptable. If you have some one telling you that you are not good

   enough by shouting obscenities in your face….step back and look at
   them. Look at what a pathetic person they are for needing to degrade
   and control another person. Especially a person they "love."

3. No woman, or man, deserves this treatment.
   Period. There is no action that causes another person to be violent,
   its a con game.

4. If it happens once, it will
   happen again. This is a fact and you are kidding yourself if you
   believe in the abuser for one more moment.

From the world I come from, the image of Rihanna is shocking, and I mean totally, and completely shocking. I have never, ever even had a man, or woman for that matter, even try to lay a hand on me. Ever. Not my parents, a boyfriend, my husband, or any friend or family member. Nor have I ever witnessed such violence.This type of violent treatment is so totally out of my
realm of reality it just stuns me.

I want it to start stunning YOU.

You need to be stunned by any and all verbal and/or physical abuse in your life.

And you need to turn away from it to get your life back.

Either that, or you stay in this cycle of abuse and watch a small part of you fade away with each and every punch, slap, and cuss word.

You are not alone- reach out for help.

-mV
XOXOXO

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RESOURCES:

If you need help or know someone who does, call the National Teen
Dating Abuse Helpline at 866-331-9474 or the National Domestic Violence
Hotline at 800-799-SAFE

Love is not abuse

Love is respect

Teen Dating Bill Of Rights

7 Warning Signs of Teen Abuse

Call for help: 1-866-331-9474 or 1-866-331-8453 TTY.

I'm sorry but any woman who lines up for a cattle call for a chance to marry "some dude" is nuts. I mean really girls, where has our self esteem gone?

Yahoo's Top Entertainment Story Today, why would you want to subject yourself to this?

This latest fiasco on The Bachelor is the kicker - the guy proposes to one, then changes his mind and asks the other – and she accepts? The 50's are over man, and why are we headed back?

I truly think this is pathetic. If one of my friends, or god forbid my daughter someday, wanted to go on this program I would be seriously worried about their mental health.

A. You don't line up for a husband under any circumstances.

B. You don't beg a guy to choose you. 

C. You sure as hell don't go on national TV, stand in a room of other contenders, and start balling if you don't get "a rose."

This all goes back to one simple thing – self esteem.

If these girls had any respect for themselves, they would not even dream of getting married this way (and none of you better either!)

I blame the rest on their parents, yes they are grown women, but for cripes sake can't we even raise a child with the confidence to stand on their own, know what they are worth, and not settle for less? The parents of these fine, smart women even participate in the selection process for goodness sake!

NOT normal. Rant over.

Am I off my rocker?

mV

Thanks for Hannah for directing me to this totally enraging ad campaign from chip maker Frito-Lay.

Objective:
Con women into eating salty snacks without feeling guilty and fat.

Process:
Create an interactive web site (must have cost them a mint) centered around four, fab, funny, fearless females (gag).

My personal fave is Cheryl who describes her "secret shame" as "I lost five pounds, but somehow they found me again."

LOL! Talk about FritoLame!!

On to "secret shame"… how many marketing geniuses did it take to come up with that little diddy? I don't know about you, but I usually hide in the back of my closet, in the fetal position, clutching my salty snacks, and praying for forgiveness.
 
Throughout the annoyingly cheesy "webisodes" there are several references to skinny jeans, fat, not eating, losing weight, and so much more fun and frivolity that I am running out to Walmart tonight to smash a few bags of Doritos..

Summary
Beyond the secret shame discovery, Frito-Lay's intense "guilt" study revealed we are soothed by mellow colors, so they reworked the packaging to create the illusion that their snacks are super healthy.

The irony here is – I liked Baked Lays! I liked Sun Chips, and I love Nacho Cheese Doritos – hell if I am going to spend a penny on them now.

Who do they think they are kidding?
-mV

What are flippers?

Dentures for toddlers used in Beauty Pageants.

Flippers are used when baby teeth fall out, causing the child's smile to be no longer perfect enough for pageantry (God forbid a beauty queen would be allowed to stand on stage with a tooth missing, that would reveal to the audience this child is actually a living breathing human being, not some sort of trained robot). Disturbing.

, through the use of spray on tans, diamonds, sparkles,  wigs, hairpieces, and over the top makeup such as fake eyelashes. It's your basic child sexualization that this country has become accustomed to. Unacceptable.

What is Toddlers and Tiaras?
A reality show focused on the worst of the worst stage parents, who go about polishing, glossing, and prepping their little dollies to prance on stage. The kids cry as they are primped, while the mothers paste on their fake smiles and tell the viewing audience how much their child loves pageants.

Why is it then, when one does not win, the parent is the one balling, not the kid? Either these parents are living vicariously through their children, or they are just whacked. Scary.

Who is a very disturbed man?

This demented father who started planning pageantry for his daughter the moment he found out his wife was having a girl when pregnant, and is now a blogger for the program.

Who wants to ban this show?

Go nuts, there is already a Facebook group dedicated to the cause.  

mV

*Warning: Triggering & Disturbing

This image received over 1800+ diggs; one of the top pictures of all time in Digg's "General Science" category.

The inspiration for the "Attractive Face Scale" experiment was derived from two scholarly sources; Hot or Not, and my personal fave Beauty Check.

,

Beauty, it appears, is now a matter of science. And according to the genius Pierre, the inventor of this  technology, concludes his hypothesis;

"FAT IS NOT ATTRACTIVE."

Wow…dude…. now that is deep.

You have personally inspired many, many more girls to strive to meet your standards by starving themselves at the tender age of 8.

Congrats,

mV

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PS For more disturbing fun facts, click over to Pierre's flickr page, hover your mouse over the image and see all the wonderful comments users have made on each and everyone of the images within the collage http://www.flickr.com/photos/pierre_tourigny/146532556/

True story…You are a teacher at a grade school, and it is lunchtime.

You see a 5th grade student pull a can of Slim-Fast out of her lunch box.

What do you do?
What do you think?
What can you say?
What should you say?

This is what is happening in our grade schools today; parents with such severe lack of judgment that their answer to a perceived or perhaps real weight problem is to have her choke down a diet shake (in this particular case there is no weight problem what-so-ever).

Think about how other children are impacted by this?
What diet habits have you seen in young children and do you remain silent or speak up?

Personally, I'd raise hell.

-mV

What do you see when you look in the mirror?

About Face, by Burt and Kline, is a book I stumbled upon a few weeks ago. The forward is written by Bobbi Brown, I woman I never thought much of – until now. I'll admit; I judged Brown. I assumed she was fake, being a makeup artist and all, but her story floored me.

"When I was eighteen, my mother offered to buy me a nose job. I still remember the moment she sat on my bed and told me that she loved me and wanted the best for me. She said a nose job would make me more beautiful," Brown states.

She point blank turned down her mothers offer because she liked what she saw when she looked in the mirror, and this moment laid the foundation for her life work.

My husband is familiar with the book, he has seen me reading it over the past few weeks, so we started discussing it.

"So, what do you see when you look in the mirror?" I asked him.

"Ummm….I usually think I look tired. Black circles…you know" he revealed.

"What else?" I prodded.

"What do you mean what else?" he asked sincerely (he really didn't understand what I meant).

"Do you like what you see?" I said.

Pause.

"Yeah. Usually." he said.

"That's it?" I asked.

"Pretty much," he said "I guess a book like that written by men would be really boring."

Now understand, my husband is a thinker. I call him the girl in our relationship sometimes because he loves discussing things, issues, thoughts, ideas (he's as writer, didn't I get lucky?). The fact that he didn't really have much to say on this topic really made me think.

Guys generally don't have issues with their looks. They don't obsess. They don't crisis in front of the mirror every morning. They don't spend a fortune on makeup. And they don't change their outfit 10 times before going out. They accept the hand they are dealt and they live their lives.

So we carried on talking about this subject for a minute or two, and then he said-

"Babe, not to change the subject, but can you shave my back?"

Shave his back. I was dieing laughing.

Damn, life is easier as a guy,

- mamaV

P.S. The next post will be my thoughts on what I see when I look in the mirror and I'll be looking forward to hearing your personal story. This is a way harder exercise then I thought it would be….so start pondering how you feel and how you can put it into words.

——-

So here is what I see when I look in the mirror.

Hold on to your hats ladies, its time to introduce Fling!  The secret-sparkly-naughty-low-calorie-indulgent-little fingers for the chocolate obsessed woman in all of us.

"Your boyfriend doesn't
need to know," is one of the themes of the Fling marketing campaign.

Let me get this straight – when we eat a chocolate bar it MUST be;
1) kept a secret
2) low in calories
3) make us feel naughty (I can't stand that word)

I don't know about you, but I've been eating candy and chocolate out in public for some time now and I have yet to be arrested.

Here's the really fun part girls- it sparkles! Even with different color sparkles! Yippee!!! They just added a touch of Mica, a mineral also used in makeup, teeth whitener, automobile paint and plastic containers (don't worry its totalllyyy safe).

The Fling website is the greatest, it is so 80's you have to check it out. Here are the homepage images;

What kind of marketing moron put these together? This product is from Mars, can't they throw some cash at the campaign?

My favorite image is the woman staring at the camera, with a huge ass grin on her face, while putting on lipstick. Now that is so very, very relevant to selling a chocolate bar.

Wrap this turd up in a pink package and you've got the ultimate kick-in-the-crotch candy bar for women across the land!

Enough said,

mV

Many of you state that you do not have support, you don’t relate, your family does not understand. So I pose a challenge back to you.

Find a role model.

There is one out there for each and every one of you, but you may have to keep searching until you find that individual that gets you. The person who doesn’t judge, always listens, and gently guides you to the help you need.

Let the hunt begin!

Step #1: Your Parents
First and foremost, approach your parents. You can let your guard down, and tell them- tell them what you are going through. Although you don’t believe they will understand, the vast majority of parents will understand and they want nothing more than to help their children.

I remember when I told my mom about my ED, I was so scared, but I was so sick of it all too. It was so weird to me that she didn’t notice on her own, wasn’t it obvious I was suffering? It wasn’t. My mom is the most intuitive, loving, giving person, and even she did not see all the signs I thought I was shoving in her face.  So, you need to get over the fact that no one is paying attention to your issues, and understand they may not even be aware.

Step #2: Siblings & Relatives
If the parent route doesn’t fly, or they are simply not good role models, you need to look beyond them.

Many of you have expressed that your mother has pushed her body hate on to you. Or you have an insensitive father who calls you fat or is just plain abusive. Their issues are not your issues. Just get it out of your head that you were meant to be in this position and you will never get out of it. There is a way out — you just need to open your eyes, and trust you will be guided.

You need to look to siblings and other family members. Most of us have
someone in our lives we kind of trust, someone that has the potential to be real, so you need to reach out to them.

Step #3: Friends
No,no no – you are not stopping here. If you’ve gotten this far and everyone has disappointed you, take a few deep breaths and regroup.

You have likely been squashed to the mat. It sucks, big time. But you have got to get up again. When you get knocked down in life, do your crying, and then get up. Get up and keep moving.

Ok, so what friends to you have? Don’t say “none. Chances are you have pushed everyone away so you can immerse yourself in your ED. Call a few of those people back into your life. Take the chance that they will listen and that they will help.

Step #4: Teachers & Colleagues
If the family has failed you, your friends are not there, you then move on to search for people that it will likely be harder to approach. I am talking about teachers, colleagues, hell – try the gym instructor.

Guys, life is really rough sometimes. You may very well fall down several times before you find the right person, but you will if you persevere. No one said it was going to be easy.

So that’s the plan. Let’s do it and see where we end up.

What I see is young women stuck. Stuck in a pattern of self hate that has become the norm, it is expected, it is all in compassing.

But it doesn’t need to be- you just have to step outside your boundaries. Take chances. Make mistakes. This is all part of growing up and living life. And living life hating yourself not a life at all. You know this.

If you are ready, I challenge you to find that role model this week.

Figure out who that person is, muster up the courage to tell them who you really are, and let it all fly.

I am expecting we will have some good stories, some not so good stories. But such is life. The only way out of this big black hole is to crawl out. At least you’ll do the crawling with others who understand.

You are not alone,

mamaV

xoxo

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Post inspired by The National Report on the State of Self Esteem, Real Girls, Real Pressure, commissioned by Dove. Read it, absorb it, and tell yourself you will not be a statistic.

Perfect Bod Celebrity turned normal – the entire world freaks!

Simpson then and now: Daisy-duke dream girl turns beautiful woman.

Google her name "Jessica Simpson" to find 300+ fat stories leading the way. Classy headline examples include;

Jessica Simpson: This Is How She Rolls
Jessica Simpson's jeans of terror
Jessica Simpson packs it in for Tony Romo

Here's the deal. The girl had no where to go but up. She was screwed. When one is born with such good genes and a killer bod like Simpson, it's only a matter of time that some aesthetic change will occur – and anything looks fat next to then her pose in daisy-dukes.

And the world is fricken mean.
The media is relentless.

They will not stop until she gives, diets, and shows up in a few months slimmer and trimmer to prove her worth. It doesn't matter how many people say she looks great. It doesn't matter if she thinks she looks great, the pressure is too immense. Can you even imagine being under this kind of scrutiny?

I recall a personal story, which I know many of you with ED's will relate to. I was 17, an anorexic waif returning from Paris, going back to High School to finish up my senior year (yes it was hell, but thank god my parents made me do it), and the judgments were rampant. My class had graduated, I was in with the younger class, and of course everyone knew I was the "Paris Model." I wanted to hide because I didn't want to be that girl anymore because I couldn't live up to their expectations.

As I worked my ass off to get healthy, trying to get my head screwed back on straight, I gained weight to be at a normal weight – others noticed alright.

And they were mean.
Girls are relentless.

"She's the model?" they whispered behind my back.
"She's not that pretty" others stabbed.

I even remember going to a party years later and running into this snobby makeup artist that I never liked anyway because she was a total fake. She took one look at me and said, in front of a room full of people;

"Oh, Heather – I remember meeting you when you were so fat! I was thinking- she is the Paris model?!"

What was I supposed to do with that?
I should have pounded her, but the truth is I felt like shit.

I pile of shit that had worked years to be deprogrammed from the psycho modeling world only to be demeaned again and again by our society.

The point of the story today is;
You can not win ladies.
You absolutely can not win.

The question of the day is:
Who are you living for?
What are you doing to impress others?
Is it working for you?

-mamaV

That's right, that's me – a certified lunatic.

At least that is the way the rest of the world makes me feel at times. Especially since just a few decades ago, one would be placed in a Sanitarium for the most common of illnesses, and Hollywood portrayed Prozac as a happy pill.

I compare my life as an anxiety freak to a "hamster on a
wheel." Heartbeat pumping, rushing off to nowhere, with an absolute inability to just
get off the damn thing and rest.

After 33 years of living like this, I had enough. I decided to try medication. A decision that turned out to be was one of the best
decisions I have ever, ever done for myself.

That decision literally
changed my life.

So much so, I have decided to share my story to encourage the many other anxiety suffers out there that there is hope;

At 33 years old, and a mother of two wonderful, amazing children, the wife of an incredible man, I was 
lost in the fog. The fog of anxiety that pulls you away from the here and now, and sucks you into an imaginary world of worries, like an incessant tap-tap-tap on the shoulder. Day, after day, after day, it pounds on you, wearing you down until you give.

Anxiety not only exhausts you, it kills you. It kills your enthusiasm, your passion for life, and your ability to be in the moment. Eventually, anxiety can turn into physical pain, chronic pain that forces you to face the reality and the magnitude of the problem. For me, the chronic pain settled in my neck and shoulders causing chronic and debilitating headaches that sent me to Mayo Clinic to seek a solution.

I tried every single possible natural solution to anxiety available. First, the usual stuff – meditation, yoga, and talk therapy. Nothing touched it. I moved on to the less known approaches, such as light therapy, behavioral therapy workbooks, cortisone shots, acupuncture, and oriental herbal teas. Still the pain and suffering continued.

So, when I was 9 months pregnant with my son, I told my therapist to get the drugs ready because the minute that kid was out, the pills are going in! (no I didn't nurse)

Side effects are difficult for some, but I was lucky because mine were minimal (especially compared to how I was feeling) so the hardest part was waiting the weeks for the medicine to take effect. When they did, I felt reborn. Sounds dramatic, and kind of cheesy, but I swear to you I was finally, finally – me….

• Reading has become a huge part of my life.

• The moment. I discovered what it is to be, to live in the moment, I don't recall being capable of my entire adult life.

• Relationships improved because one with anxiety often make others feel anxious – which can be difficult for friends and family.

It's been 6 years now, and I've accepted the fact that I will likely be on medication for a lifetime. Regardless of possible unknown health impacts, I would rather live 10 more years with this peaceful mind, than 50 more years feeling uncomfortable in my own skin.

To the 38% of you on medication according to our poll on the right, I hope you will share your story as
well.

To the 28% who have tried meds, but no longer take them, tell us about experience. I think it is very important to hear both sides of this story.

To the 15% considering medication, I hope this post has been helpful to you. This step is a very personal decision, and it is one you need to make on your own if and when you are ready.

Love,

mamaV

xoxo

——

With all of Oprah's drama over her weight gain, and the resulting encouragement for us all to "get back on the wagon" as to not embarrass ourselves -one would think her diet plan is free in order to build a true sense of community.

Not a chance.

Oprah's savior of the moment, Bobby Greene, charges $9.95 per month for his wisdom – after a 30 day trial.

Quite interesting, especially since this price has been reduced already, which last week was $19.95 per month with no trial- I guess sales are a bit slow?

The article
about her talking about her weight gain wasn't even free until recently – instead it was printed in a two page excerpt as a teaser – with a call to action to "buy the magazine for the full story."

Irritating.

Both Oprah and Bob are rolling in dough, and this feels like they are preying upon the vulnerable with the latest bogus diet scam. With all due respect Oprah, your diet history speaks for itself;

Your 20+ million viewers have watched you tout the "Liquid Diet" in the late 80's, then on to the Rosie Daley Best Chef on the Planet meal plan, to a Vegan cleanse as recent as June 2008 – and now on to Bobby's Best Life Secret -  your newest hero with THE answer.

Sorry Oprah, I love ya, but you are going to be crying in your soup again before we know it. I think you have a serious responsibility to not drag all of us along for ride….much less benefit financially from it.

Oh, before I forget – I tried a little test just for the heck of it. I entered my weight 148 and my goal weight 108 into Bob Greene's Best Life Diet sign up form.

Not a problem! You want to be pro anorexic, Bob will be there for you (and not hesitate take your cash)

Sloppy. The whole thing is just sloppy.

Disappointed,
-mamaV

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Fun Facts: Oprah's Reach:

Every day, she reaches more than 26 million Americans – and countless
viewers in 100 other countries – from the comfortable sofa of her own
chat show. Fans have rejoiced that she's just signed a deal to host 140
episodes per year, up until 2010. Her website, www.oprah.com, averages
two million visitors a month and receives an astonishing 10,000 emails
each week.

The word "feminist" scares me.

No matter how you cut it, declaring oneself a feminist has a negative connotation; something along the lines of man hating, bitchy lesbians, with hairy armpits.

I started on this trail a few months ago, because I have been called a feminist a few times, and it caught me by surprise. I figured should educate myself on exactly what the word means, and then figure out how I fit in. Big problem – everyone has a different definition.

Google "what is feminism" to find over 3 million results. That's 3M+ pages of content, filled with everything from bible-thumpers reminding us of our need to obey our husbands, to completely whacked out women haters who I wouldn't want to come face to face with on the street.

So, I whipped up a definition of my own;

All people matter.
Inequality of rights is unfair regardless of sex or race. 


Being a feminist means you live, breath and exude your real self.
Being a feminist means you are not afraid to demand equality.
Being a feminist means you help other women, girls, and daughters discover their own voice.

That's a far cry from the Feminazi label coined by genius Rush Limbaugh (I have to apologize for even writing
that word, it sickens me that this has become a catch phrase).

How about you- are you a feminist who stands proud? Or one who lurks in the background?
Does my definition classify me as a feminist? If yes, where do I fit into the chaos?

Peace out,

-mamaV

WARNING: THE FOLLOWING VIDEO CONTAINS ADULT IMAGES AND IS NOT APPROPRIATE FOR CHILDREN UNDER 13...oh, that's right, the performer is a 10 year old girl

Thanks to Mollie for sending me a link to this disturbing video of a 10
year old "woman" performing her choreographed dance routine, including
hip thrusts, booty shaking, and sexy pouting…just like good ole'
Britney.

Naa…the media doesn't influence behavior, that's just silly.

-mamaV

"She said she wasn't going to eat her dessert because she was going to the doctor in the afternoon and she would be weighed."

These are words uttered by my 8 year old daughter yesterday. The comment was made by a classmate of hers at GRADE SCHOOL.

My heart sank. This is it, this is where it all starts. No turning back.

But at 8 years old?? If you can't recall back, 8 years old is 3rd grade. Yes. All the stats show this is when body image issues start, and dieting comes into play, and girls self esteem across the land slide directly down the tubes with the rest of us…but somehow I wasn't expecting it. My girl was just born – wasn't she?

What do we expect when every New Year everybody and their brother is pitching the latest diet, Oprah herself is beating herself bloody over weight gain, TV is plastered with YOU ARE A FAT ASS ads, and Amazon carries over 14,000 diet books. Lord help me.

But then…

"We are too young for this. It's ridiculous."

Words uttered again – not by me – by my daughter.

I asked "Why?" as a smile spread across my face.

"We just are. We are kids. We aren't supposed to be thinking about that stuff. Because we are kids."

"That's right babe. That's right." I said knowing its best to hold back my over the top emotions on this subject.

As I looked at my angel face girl, I was so proud, and so scared, butterflies fluttering in my stomach. But then, this unexpected confidence came over me. We will be ok, we will work through these ugly years together, just like my mom and I did,

At least, that's my hope.

-mamaV

I actually had a male boss say this about me behind my back. It took everything in me not to strangle the bastard. Needless to say, my tenure with him was short and certainly not sweet. 

Check out how the pay gap is shrinking at a snails pace since the 1960s.

Ladies- we are only making .77 cents on the dollar compared to our male counterparts.

Why are we not up in arms about this?

Do you believe that this discrimination is not happening to you?

You can bet your ass it is.

So when you go to work or school tomorrow, I want you to glance at the dude sitting next to you and think about the fact that he makes more than you simply because he is a man.

Or, if you are really in a mood, ask your male colleagues that you trust to confide in you their pay. I can tell you right now you will be irate at what you find. Then shove it in your bosses face and demand equal pay.

This is why I FINALLY run my own business. No more letting others control my financial future. No more Corporate greed driving my income potential.

This is bullshit beyond belief.

Carry on,

-mamaV

—————–

WHAT YOU CAN DO:

Join the WAGE project

Contact The Speaker of The House Nancy Pelosi

Order your Equal Pay Day Kit

Looking for ways to spend that holiday cashola$$? Well, you could donate to Fight The Good Fight….or screw that, how about some good-ole fashion selfishness.It's been a looonnnggg year, we deserve it!

This sassy "I'm Foxy and Crafty" apron may be right up your alley, it's time to flaunt your talent. 

Check out Vinnie's tampon case, no more stuffing your goods in your pocket in the way to the bathroom at work, swing this sleek, vinyl number from your hip in style.

The "I Love Carbs" tote bag pairs nicely with the Butter T-Shirt. Remember ladies just say no to low fat appetizers.

Mud-Flap boy is the bomb. I've made stickers for my mini-van, and all the other moms are just raving about them!

And last, but not least, for those of you who barely escaped Christmas alive, do what I do. Hang one of these charming cross-stitch treasures in your hallway, front and center, so Aunt Betsy doesn't dare to give you any shit on New Year's Eve.

Ta-Ta for now my lovelies,

-mamaV

Smile of the day.

Compliments of Feministing

-mV