Real Women Say Their Age

"Mama, at school when we sing Happy Birthday to the teachers, we don't say their age," inquired my 9 year old daughter.

"Oh really? What do you mean?" knowing full well exactly what she was getting to.

"We skip the 'how old are you part of the song. Why?" she said.

How would you answer this question?

I answered it by telling her that women have a 'thing' about their age. I told her that society and media tends to make women feel like its better to be young, and then I went on to say I think its was nuts especially because I am so very proud to be turning the big 4-0 this year!


images from Dove ProAge Blog

My girl did not skip a beat, and responded with this,

"Well Grandma is old. I mean, she is like 70…..and Grandma is the greatest!"

"Yep babe, Grandma is the greatest." I said with a huge smile spreading across my face.

Well, that was easy,



Who would you rather hang with?

Natural beauty Streep or Frozen Face Kidman?


Pistol Bening or Balloon Boobs Beckham? (c'mon! how do you even haul those things around?)


Real-deal Curtis or 'She Was So Cute Before' Ryan?


Think about who you really want to be.

What type of image are you projecting now?

Think about what you want your legacy in life to be. 

Do you want to be remembered for your vainty?

Think about the type of people you like to be around?

Are they hard, fake, and frozen….or are they soft, gentle, and real?


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14 Responses to Real Women Say Their Age

  1. .C. says:

    My friend’s brother gave him a photograph he took for Christmas. It was supposed to be a picture of their youngest brother, but he refused to pose unless his mom did with him. The little boy is clasped in her arms, looking like he can only be caught for a moment before running off somewhere else; the mother is behind him, smiling just faintly as if caught mid-sentence. Her hair has been lost to chemotherapy, and there are wrinkles all over her face and about her eyes. She is beautiful.

  2. Leasa says:

    I think it’s stupid that society hates aging. I mean, is it seriously a big mystery why so many people commit suicide? That was one of my reasons in my attempt, that I was afraid to get older, that people wouldn’t love me anymore when I was older. Because kids are the most adorable things in the world, and older people… meh…
    But I think it’s really stupid. I mean, life isn’t just about being a kid… There’s like, WAYYYYYYYYYY more to it. And that includes wrinkles.
    Before I got old enough to know, I admired wrinkles – I saw them in my grandma and I loved them just like I love her. It’s part of being a grandma, it’s part of life. Why must we shy away from LIFE?!
    grrr… It makes me so unhappy. :(
    and p.s. about your post confessing use of anti-aging creams. seriously, i don’t think they are much different than regular creams. I bet most of what you are feeling is just the happiness of being taken care of? Creams always make me feel good. :) (No biggie.)

  3. Leasa says:

    oh, and I despise plastic surgery. I already hated plastic. There is no way plastic is going to be a part of me.
    I feel sad for people who are partly plastic. :\

  4. Kristen says:

    Wrinkles, scars, and other non-plastic parts of our faces should be worn like badges of honor. I’m 26 and have begun to notice laugh lines. My eyes also get squinty when I smile and laugh, so I’m getting crows feet. I have great skin and wear minimal makeup.
    I remember your post about anti-wrinkle cream. I occasionally use it around my eyes and laugh lines, but it’s not so that they’ll go away completely. I like to think of it as taking care of the fine lines of my face. :)

  5. Jen says:

    As a teacher myself, I don’t tell my kids how old I am – not because of vanity, but because I’m a fairly young teacher and if they knew my age it could take away some of my authority.

  6. -Jen- says:

    Wait…there’s a ‘how old are you’ part of the song? I’ve never heard that….EVER!

  7. Jen says:

    To the other Jen…
    My students love to guess my age. And eventually I tell them how old I really am. I’m 27 and they love that I’m one of their younger teachers. Hasn’t taken away any of my authority yet….it’s actually been helpful as far as them knowing that I really do understand where they are coming from.

  8. olesya says:

    i’ve never heard that part either. i’ve been trying to figure it out since this afternoon when i saw the video. i’m glad i’m not the only one.

  9. .C. says:

    It’s a whole second verse, to the same tune:
    How old are you now
    How old are you now
    How old are you now
    How old are you now?

  10. BoomersFun says:

    Age is just a number. Sometimes life experiences mature us at a much more rapid rate than years. One of my friends 46-y/o currently dating a man at one one friendly senior dating site called “” , who is 35 years her junior but my friend said he makes her laugh, feel safe, respected and loved. Isn’t that what they all really want? Who’s to say whether it’s right or wrong?

  11. over40fun says:

    I agree with one of my friends on “—- —-” words: “Older women “RULE” ! We’re more experienced, more confident, have more financial security, we’re less self-conscious, we don’t rely on our ‘parents’ or our ‘girlfriends’ to make a decision (we think for ourselves), and we stand on our own two feet and………….WE rule.
    The only thing about younger women..they are younger…but that’s all they are”

  12. kay says:

    mama v,
    i think the age thing has completely permeated every facet of society. In my case january 6, i turned 23, and the first thing i said was…i am now 17 yrs. away from 40…like it was some sort of count down to doom..but i look at my mother and i think “if this is what 40 looks like then count me in”..everyone thinks she is half her age…not only that, but i think society makes us feel that by a certain age there are benchmarks that need to be accomplished…and if i am not a success by the time i am (insert age) you think you are not worth anything..that is absolutely brutal
    in terms of friends, my friends are few but they are good. They love me for who i am and we can have deep intellectual meaningful discussion. Whereas before certain freinds could only handle little pleasantries..nothing deep only “pop culture gossip”..needless to say we are no longer friends
    mama…thanks for this blog, where you pose thought provoking questions, and make us think sincerely about things that many times go unchallenged.
    and give your daughter a high five from me!!

  13. smudgeruk says:

    I still can’t believe Victoria Beckham maintains those half-grapefruits are real…
    As for age, I’m 30 this year. I have no idea where my 20s went! Turning 30 isn’t one of the bigger “milestone” ages, of course, but a colleague once told me that his mother had summed up your 30s as follows:
    “It’s the time in your life when you can really put into place all the plans and dreams you had in your 20s – you’ve got the means and the experience and the wisdom to really start living”. Sounds good to me. :)

  14. Christine says:

    I always wanted to hang out with Katherine Hepburn and Barbara Stanwyck. I turned 40 last year. I never thought much about how I’d look old because I didn’t figure I would live that long. I’m pretty sure now I will and it does catch me off guard when I see myself in the mirror because I don’t look like I still picture myself looking. I look older. But I also look like a completely normal heavy American mom, like most of my son’s classmates moms, like my grandmother, like the family members of famous people that get shown on t.v. who also look normal.

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