Stupid Ass Diet Tricks

What is the most ridiculous thing you have every tried to lose weight?

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Jezebel recently posted on a Glamour Rag article dedicated to this topic, “Scary Diet Tricks No Woman Should Try!”

Before you all freak and tell me that I am providing tips and tricks for pro anas or individuals with ED’s please just stop. The web is crawling with this crap so don’t delude yourself into believing I am revealing some mystery here. Plus not one item on the Glamour list was new to me, so my guess you all won’t be surprised either.

My lamest attempt at weight loss?

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Baby food. Who the hell knows how I even came up with this idea, but we all know the mind does strange things when deliberately starved. Didn’t taste bad really, but the vision of a teenage girl walking down the street chomping down strained peas from a mini glass Gerber jar is rather psycho.

Your turn,

-mamaV 

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39 Responses to Stupid Ass Diet Tricks

  1. vive42 says:

    ok, you want people to share? you don’t believe tips and tricks can be harmful. i bet you anything i can come up with one that isn’t on the list that would be harmful to anyone who tried it and might even help them lose weight, since i’m more than 100 pounds below the weight i was at when i started this technique.

    the method is this: train your brain. i purposefully set out to train my thoughts into certain patterns. specifically, i trained myself when i lost weight to think “you are FAT. who cares that you lost weight, don’t you dare be happy or proud since you are still FAT.” i trained myself to look in every mirror or window and think “FAT” at every opportunity, and i trained myself never to think anything like “you’re looking much thinner!” or “wow, what great progress!” i trained myself to respond to any offers of food or drink “no way! there’s calories in that shit!” ha. ha. ha. it was perfectly funny when i was obese, less so when i was already thin.

    i trained myself to hate myself and never give myself a moments peace. i trained myself to respond to any healthy thoughts with “that’s fat girl thinking. do you want to be fat, vanessa?” i trained my mind to torture me at every turn.

    now, i happen to believe that sharing such things could be harmful. someone might read this and think, hey, i could do that! and end up more miserable than they are. but since you say that it doesn’t matter i thought i’d tell it straight and if you’d like to remove this or edit it, feel free. but don’t accuse me or anyone like me of being an “influencer” when this sort of thing would be banned from my pro ana forum and most pro ana forums and sites out there today.

    Vanessa

  2. Shana says:

    have you read the discussion/comments over at the jezebel site? it’s pathetic.

    people are sharing their tricks with each other. that’s sweet. and what’s the point?

    how much do you wanna bet that someone reads this blog and tries to survive on baby food for a bit?

    do you honestly want this thread to turn into a horror story-fest abt the ridiculous lengths that eating disordered people go to to lose weight?

    cuz that’s disordered =p

  3. Arrie says:

    – Vanessa, I realize what your saying is harmful in more ways than one. But to all the people on here suffering with and ED, including myself… That is nothing new. And for most, nothing we need to “train” ourselves to do, because I cant really speak for others, but my brain already thinks like that. Trained or not.

    -MamaV, I think the blog is fine. Because what your saying is right, most of the cmmnts that will be left saying their stories of “weight Loss Tips” wont be anything new to most of us. I even think that in some ways its comforting for some to read, or me anyways because it shows that your not the only one in the world who has gotten down to the level of being so wrapped around your ED to do some pretty crazy things in order to loose weight. To me, it makes me feel, less alone in this disorder.

  4. vive42 says:

    arrie- sorry, i should have been more clear! obviously that sort of thinking is nothing new to someone who already has an eating disorder. i meant it wasn’t something people would read in a magazine, and that it was potentially new and harmful to someone who didnt already have an eating disorder.

  5. Arrie says:

    Vanessa,
    okay, I was just referring to the “blog” and how it would affect, I guess the ppl on here. But your deff. right about the potential danger of someone reading it out of a magazine. But I dont think id ever see that in a magazine. haha, or hopefully not.

  6. Josie says:

    Most crazy thing i ever did … ate a rather small amount. Stupidest thing i’ve ever done because my periods stopped, i grew body hair, i developed weeping sores around my mouth, blacked out in the shower, couldn’t get out of bed, worsened my multitude of mental health problems, and, yes, developed an eating disorder.

    There’s only very few ways to actually lose weight. Most of them are bollocks because we’re dumb enough to try out of desperation. And besides – a lot of them are money-makers.

  7. Josie says:

    I remember when i was little, if my mum told me off i’d try and wiggle out of it by pointing out others who were doing things wrong. It never worked.
    This post reminds me of it “it’s okay to do this because all these other people are doing it…..”

    I used to drink green tea. And water with lemon juice. I stopped after my male friends pointed out how gross they tasted and asked why on earth i’d drink them, and i saw their point.

    Maybe i’m a hypocrite for my contributions. But then green tea and lemon water won’t do anything but good. And i gave every reason you shouldn’t eat too little. I’ll have to hope the reasons for not eating babyfood or inducing unhealthy thought-processes are self-explanatory.

    When it comes to “Ana Tips”, most of them were derived from supposedly reputable sources. One of the most lethal tips actually started out as a WeightWatchers tip; hell knows what they were thinking.
    It is strange how anorexics aren’t supposed to share tips, yet ‘normal’ people are encouraged to do so.
    Worth a thought.

  8. vive42 says:

    oooh good post, josie.

    and i usually would never post a tip anywhere for any reason. i just got so pissed off at this post that i temporarily took leave of my senses in an attempt to demonstrate how harmful they might be. someone following my “tip” would not be guaranteed weight loss, but they would be guaranteed misery.

    i thought it was worth it to be thin at any price. i was wrong. thinness isnt worth your sanity.

  9. shelly says:

    The title “scary diet tips no women should try” makes me chuckle, but when I was in my disorder or even starting to dabble with anorexia I wouldnt have laughed. For me, when someone told me not do something I did it and when people told me to do things I didnt do them. So that title alone would make me try the tips long ago in my quest for the perfect body. And I didnt really need a magazine article to tell me what to do.I hate to admit I have tried pretty much all of them and I became very sick, but hell I was Thin. I cant believe how stupid I was. yes, stupid. I really wonder if the people at glamour realize that publishing this article probably f*** up a lot of young girls and womens lives. But, people are going to find this sort of stuff everywhere. I am just glad I now realize that I would rather be happy, peaceful, a pleasure to be around with and at a normal weight than a grumpy, angry, tired waif.
    For all of those who might give these a try. The weight loss will not last, you will end up in the hospital, and you will probably die…all the while you will lose everything you have and everyone who loves you and you love in the process. and treatment is really expensive…if you can even afford it. Good luck
    (sorry I am kind of in a bad mood)

  10. ibiteback says:

    I agree with what shelly says. For someone on the “brink” of an eating disorder, words like “scary” and “diet tips” may seem like a drastic way to lose weight. They would try it. MamaV is always using shock value, like “look had bad this is! never try these drastic things that anorexics do!” But then it makes people with an eating disorder who doesn’t do these things feel like they don’t do enough. The danger part of the article could be overlooked and only the diet, lose weight like crazy would be seen. Maybe MamaV should talk about problems facing recovering people, like insurance companies who won’t pay for life saving and needed treatment.

  11. Sass1948 says:

    MamaV, remember that anorexic woman on the posters you posted about? there’s this show in the UK, called “supersize v superskinny” & this reporter anna richardson interviewed her!, & also tested lotsa fad diets. brilliant show. 8 episodes per season. ppl should check it out.

    answer to question:
    i still do it – c/s. spent 2 yrs doing this on & off…no weight gain as yet. phew. done all the therapy tricks “it’s a habit, walk a new path” & know what? whether am having a hectic day or a lazy day I still wanna do it. maybe it’ll go away in time. it’s nothing am too worried bout now, nor is my therapist so, guess that’s OK. but when i actually think about it, or discuss it with my therapist i am amazed at how STUPID & wasteful it is & down right weird, too :-(

  12. aileb says:

    check: not eating
    check: laxatives
    check: steam rooms
    check: master cleanse

    Thanks MamaV and Glamor Magazine for pointing me in the right direction. My size oo’s aren’t falling off and it’s really bumming me off! So, I guess I have more things to do.

    Amphetamines, horse pills, alli, syrup of ipecac, and ephedra.
    The tapeworm isn’t gonna happen-(i’m pretending to be vegan!)

    there are lists of hundred of tips and tricks on the net and these newbies missed some of my personal favorites:

    get braces=1 or 2 years of eating soft food

    get your molars removed at the same time= 1 month of a liquid diet (have we not learned anything from the Tracy Gold movie)

    fake an illness or become vegan= selective eating for life!!

    diet pills=REMEMBER: anything with the word die is
    dangerous: dieticians, dieter’s tea, and diet pills; everything in moderation.

    join a proana site and get your very own ana buddy = thinspiration for life or until they’re sent to IP. But then afterwards, she can become your reverse trigger.

    giggles…Did anyone read the cover?
    Psst.. Why guys love your body exactly as is.

  13. Sara says:

    “Maybe MamaV should talk about problems facing recovering people, like insurance companies who won’t pay for life saving and needed treatment.”

    Or maybe she should, you know, write about what matters to her in the style that comes naturally to her. Saying that is like saying Stephen King should write like Danielle Steel. Wasn’t meant to be.

    As for craziest things I did to lose weight? Combining anorexia and bulimia. I’m still amazed I didn’t die, when I was puking blood and pooping blood and passing out half of the times I stood up because I hadn’t eaten in days, or I’d puked 15 times that day. I think that’s pretty much a textbook definition of crazy.

  14. Angie says:

    If we want to have a good diet then we should consult some one for a good diet plan. But if we don’t get any consultancy then you can find a lot of good diet plans on the internet. We can find a diet plan according to our needs online.

  15. valid-i says:

    I personally think this MamaV’s post couldn’t be any less authentic. “The bizarre diet secrets of the stars” is the weeks topic everywhere. She is now “Stephen King writing like Danielle Steel”. And by saying that I’m being polite, because I think the whole idea of inviting people to get together to wallow in their torture methods is barbaric!

  16. ibiteback says:

    I just think MamaV misrepresents herself. She says she wants to change the statistic (look at the site, on the right). But all she does is tell everyone about the shocking things anorexics do. changing the statistic would be promoting healthy body image, self esteem, and posting articles about how to build up those things. To change the statistic she should post about the causes of eating disorders and how to prevent them. She resembles a gossip magazine, always showing us shocking things. When she posted stuff by Shelly that was the first none “look at what anorexics/wannarexics do!”
    If she wants to talk about this, she can go right ahead but maybe her mission should be to reveal the crazy things eating-disordered people do or how thin models are.

  17. vanity900 says:

    Remember the cyan pepper lemonaid diet? I remember i heard of it when beyonce went on it she was taling about it alot it was on the news and things and i can find the recipe everywhere on proana sites, it said the diet was littel enough to help you loose alot of weight fast but enough to keep you alive like if you were normaly eating. HAHAHA sure it is. And it burns up your sotmach sooo badly, you mine as well swallow matches its just so…ouch don’t ever try it.

  18. mamavision says:

    Hi Sara: You articulated a point I couldn’t quite find the words for. I am wondering why everyone is in the mood lately to tell me how I am not doing what I am supossed to be doing on this blog.

    Kind of odd. Kind of irritating. Kind if true.

    At the end of the day, I just write. I write what I think, what I see, what I feel. It’s a blog, not a bible.

    Never claimed to be the expert some seem to want me to be.

    I am a mom first and foremost, a woman that happens to be a former model with some shitty experience in the area of eating disorders. That combination of experience makes me believe I may be able to influence a few lives. Maybe there are a few girls out there that may read what I say, what others here say, and slowly stop being sucked into the media vortex.

    Just like I say to all of you – don’t make your personal view the world view. My personal experience is not your experience. It’s just a damn point of view, so don’t try to reign me in.

    Do I want to do some good? Yes.

    Can you do good one person at a time? Certainly.

    Am I going to post what I feel like posting?

    I’m thinking yes.
    mamaV

  19. Rose says:

    When I was 15, I picked up a Seventeen magazine that had a diet plan in it (including a few tips verging on what’s written on this Jezebel site). I was in a new school, new state, felt alone and had low self-esteem. Figured if I looked better, life would BE better. Followed the diet, when I started getting compliments for the weight loss I was hooked and tweaked the diet to lose more faster.
    That was 17 years ago. And for the past 17 years I’ve been anorexic,I’ve abused laxatives for 14 of those years, I’ve c/s-ed for 12 of those years. My prize in this cracker jack box (I say this with a large dose of sarcasm)? –, I’m 5’8 and 86 lbs, haven’t gone over 94 pounds in over 10 years.
    Well big damn woop…because I’ve wrecked my body beyond belief, my kidneys are failing me and I”m due for dialysis and a slot on a transplant waiting list in my very near future.
    I could blame the magazine , but really that wouldn’t be responsible of me as even though it was irresponsible of the magazine to print what they did, I was already suseptible to it and would’ve found my way down this wicked path eventually (on my own). I guess I’m saying that yes, it sucks that websites and magazines are full of these harmful tips, however, most rational people would not try them. I think you already have to be somewhat predispositioned to disordered eating in order to really go along with these sorts of scary methods to lose weight.
    Sure I wish i had never picked up that magazine, but more importantly I wish I could’ve just accepted and loved my 15 year old self. I would be a hell of alot happpier now.

  20. Josie says:

    MamaV – “Never claimed to be the expert some seem to want me to be” you actually have implied it, in so many of the posts you’ve made. The fact that you claim to have recovered from an ED means girls are going to flock to you desperate for advice about how to recover. They’re going to look up to you as someone who understands the issues, when actually you don’t. You present your point of views as undisputable fact, and write with an air of superiority, especially when you’re criticising anorexics.

  21. ck2r says:

    Baby food
    I remeber that last year as a girl in my class instructed her group of tag-a-longs
    “If you want boys to like you,you have to be skinny.”
    “How do we be skinny”
    “Just eat baby food and rice crackers for a week!”
    Then of course the other girl said
    “Or you could just go anorexic for the week”
    What is this idea that anorexia and bulimia can just be picked up at a drop of a hat and then discarded like another lame diet?

  22. Amanda says:

    I agree with some of the posts, that maybe posting the dumbest diet tricks may not be a good idea. I understand what MamaV is trying to do, but what good can really come of this topic? For all of us to realize we do stupid things to lose weight? I think we already know that.

    Anyways, stupid things I have done. Taken about every diet pill out there. Wasted money on food to binge on or to c/s. Wasted money on tons of laxatives. I used to drink bottles of Milk of Magnesia. In large quantities it has a laxative effect. I tried drinking water with a huge amount of Epsom salt in it. Same effect as MOM, although much harder to get down. I used to drink so much MOM, that all I had to do was look at the bottle and my stomach would start to churn. Hmm, what else? Oh yeah, I’ve taken so many laxatives that I’ve woken up in the middle of the night and had to change my clothes. Nice, huh? I’ve also tried the cayenne pepper lemonaide diet. Wouldn’t recommend that one either.

    So there you go. Now please tell me, what good will this do people?

  23. Rachel says:

    For those screaming social irresponsibility here, chew on this. Not every woman who diets will develop an eating disorder. Most women, even those who “try” some of the eating disordered tips and tricks listed on any number of websites and distributed even by doctors, probably lack the great degree of self-loathing, body hatred and biological predisposition necessary to performing these “tips” on a prolonged, sustained basis. Eating disorders are NOT a choice.

    And for those who are susceptible to an eating disorder, these tips will all be naturally learned or will be actively sought out on any number of outlets ready and willing to part with such information. Discussing the endless and ridiculous means to which we have taken in dieting isn’t promoting eating disordered behaviors or sharing some vast secret with the outside world. And it’s important to note, dieting is not synonymous with an eating disorder. Dieting is about weight loss; eating disorders are about anything but food and weight.

    As for me, some of the more ridiculous things I’ve done to lose weight is eat celery with mustard, because both have minimal calories. I also trained my brain to see food as maggots, bugs or worse. These are the silly things I’ve done; I consider other measures I’ve taken as dangerous, not silly.

  24. Hannah says:

    To Rose who said “I”m due for dialysis and a slot on a transplant waiting list in my very near future.”

    I really strongly believe that anorexics who destroy their bodies, just like alchoholics should not be allowed kidney transplants.
    Just like smokers shouldn’t be granted lung transplants.
    It’s a waste of an organ, they should be given to people who have real diseases not just mental health issues.

  25. vanity900 says:

    ck2r~

    Guys call me skinny alot, but of course also guys call me fat, like scoot called me “thunder thighs…gross” alot when i worse a skirt so iv been wearing baggy cloths for now and probably until it gets to warm to and the fam makes me wear shorts. which im terrified of i just want them to stop being mean, i think maybe thets why i want to be thjin, it would make the teasing stop. And being teased about being too skinny makes me feel good like iv accomplished things, but anorexia for a week…i hear it alot from people, friends and stuff. it pisses me off its like they’re making fun of me again, its a diease and nothings helping me get rid of it, being called fat makes me want to starve myself and being called skinny makes me want to get even skinnier… this is probably how anorexics got the sterotype that they just want to be skinny, it looks that way but in reality i want to be super thin to make my other problums go away, and if it takes dying to get there then alright. at least if you call me fat i wont hear you beond the grave. anyway im hoping to loose some weight, im not going to diet or fast or anything im gona try just restricting a bit, the fam thinks i should be eating like a cow so il cut the portions in half and i should be able to slim down my thunder thighs. anyway i ranted now…any thoughs guys?

  26. Josie says:

    Hannah – “It’s a waste of an organ, they should be given to people who have real diseases not just mental health issues”. That’s an awful attitude, and one i don’t think you should share with someone who is suffering. What about a mental health issue is not ‘real’? There IS an element of choice with mental health issues, but there’s also an element of choice with physical health issues too.

  27. nixi says:

    Hannah:- your post pissed me off. i don’t see the connection between anorexics, smokers and alcoholics?! people choose to pick up a cigarette or drink, no one chooses to be anorexic. so, if we need transplants we have every right to be on that waiting list. take your ignorance somewhere else.

  28. Nadine says:

    Nixi, I think your attitude is HYPPOCRITICAL.

    “Hannah:- your post pissed me off. i don’t see the connection between anorexics, smokers and alcoholics?! ”

    If you expect outsiders to recognize that you didn’t choose to be anorexic then maybe you should recognize that the alcoholic you’re smugly looking down on didn’t choose to be an alcoholic. As an outsider I’m willing to recognize that anorexia is not fun. I’m also willing to recognize that alcoholism is not fun either.

    “people choose to pick up a cigarette or drink, no one chooses to be anorexic. ”

    People choose to pick up drinks but they don’t choose to become alcoholic. People choose to diet but they don’t choose to become anorexic. There is a difference between picking up a drink and being an alcoholic. There is a difference between going on a diet to lose a few pounds and being anorexic.

    If you expect compassion from people then you’d better be F-ING prepared to give compassion to other people too. Compassion isn’t a one way street, Princess.

  29. Rachel says:

    Gee, I’m glad Hannah isn’t the one making life or death medical decisions when it comes to my loved ones and friends.

    Hannah, your views sound eerily of the eugenics movement, the most famous of which, were the Nazis. Should we deny skin cancer treatment coverage to girls who go to tanning beds, too? How about people who choose to drive cars? If they’re in an auto accident, do they not get health care because they chose to drive?

    People make choices every day that affects their health, positively or negatively. When we choose who is deserving or undeserving of health care, we better be prepared to have such choices be applied to the choices we ourselves make, too. But it’s much easier to cast judgment on others, isn’t it?

  30. drifting at sea says:

    I don’t mean to be rude but Nixi’s comment was extremely offensive. I work at a substance abuse facility so she touched on a nerve. Telling an alcoholic to put down his/her drink is like telling an anorexic to just eat a cupcake. I don’t see how anyone can NOT see the connection between anorexics and alcoholics. They are completely different issues but I definitely see some similarities.

    She acts like she’s better than the alcoholics. Alcoholics are human too. Take your holier than thou attitude elsewhere.

  31. Racheleli says:

    As a junior in college I weighed 180 pounds at 5’5″. I started a job that required a lot of physical work and began to lose weight. I started skipping meals just because I was busy with school, work, and keeping up a social life. Suddenly I had lost 40 pounds. I started skipping meals on purpose. I skipped breakfast, drank a slimfast for lunch, and ate one scrambled egg for dinner. I lost another 20 pounds and graduated college a healthy 120 pounds.

    The problem was that I had a completely distorted idea of what was healthy. 5’5″ and120 pounds is totally healthy, but I had also been severely restricting what I ate. As soon as I started eating a normal 3 meals a day, I gained weight again. I still struggle with this. There are days when I eat 3 healthy meals and feel fine, and then there are days when I convince myself I’m not hungry and can easily live off what I’ve eaten in the past week.

    Do I wish I was 110? Yes. Do I have an eating disorder? Not clinically. Every 25 year old I know (I live in D.C. and work with other engineers, I am not bouncing around the social scene of L.A.) is similarly concerned about eating and gaining weight.

    I don’t know if you consider that a stupid ass dieting trick, but I’m a hell of a lot happier now than I was at 180.

  32. ivia says:

    I have been anorexic since i was 13.
    There is no getting past it.
    It gives a sufferer both shame and pride. (for me at least)
    I will probably never completely recover because I can’t remember a time when I didn’t notice what was going into my mouth.
    I can remember exact meals from ten years ago, and I can remember where I had them.
    This is awful.
    My guy friends think I’m crazy.
    They don’t know the full extent, but I can only imagine their reaction.
    They would think I was f—ing out of my mind.

  33. Synesthesia says:

    To: Rose –
    No one but ‘God’ can judge you. And if you don’t believe in him than no one could ever judge you. It is -NO- person’s place to decide what’s good or evil.

    I’m ED-NOS, I’ve watched it destroy people and I’ve seen good in it as well.

    We are all our own person, and who the eff is anyone to judge? You’re not perfect. Get over it. Just live healthy and do what you can to make yourself happy without intentionally harming another.

    =^^=

  34. Thomas Williams says:

    my dad recently got a Hair Transplant, it was very expensive but the results are worth it.;;’

  35. i think it is expensive to get a hair transplant but the procedure is well worth it -‘*

  36. Ive été lecture votre blog pour un certain temps et après avoir suivi les conseils ive réussi à perdre 12 livres … merci

  37. click says:

    Im getting a tiny issue. I cant get my reader to pick-up your feed, Im using aol reader by the way.

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